قالب وردپرس درنا توس
Home / Entertainment / Trevor Noah and Stephen Colbert Bringing Attraction to Election Topics

Trevor Noah and Stephen Colbert Bringing Attraction to Election Topics



“In the presidential race, Joe Biden won Vermont, the safe state of Georgia is still too close to call, but Trump won Alabama. And you have to see it coming. I mean, Alabama loves football, it’s Trump’s exact bodybuilding, so that’s not really a surprise. – TREVOR NOAH

“Look, I don’t know why you’re surprised about Florida. First of all, I went to college in Florida – that’s what you don’t remember. I can tell you about Florida. Not two good things in Florida: South Beach and Disney World. The rest of Florida are just weird people on pickups trying to sell you baby crocodiles. – ROY WOOD JR., Reporter “The Daily Show” on Florida called for Trump

“It makes sense because Trump is like – Trump is Florida’s last mascot, you know? He has tanned skin, all of his friends are in jail, somehow he has money ”. – TREVOR NOAH

“This is crazy! It means Trump hugged all those cacti to nothing.” – TREVOR NOAH, on Biden lead in Arizona

“And Biden also won California – wow! Though Donald Trump received last-minute endorsement from the wildfires. Unbelievable.” – TREVOR NOAH

“Ohio just got called to Donald Trump. It was gone from the state of Buckeye to ”[expletive] why?’ state.” – STEPHEN COLBERT, returns to Ohio to meet Trump

“What do you expect? The same sure guess that took a perfectly delicious bowl of chili and said, ‘Know what this needs? Spaghetti.'” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Well, you know the old Ohio joke: circles at both ends and [expletive] in head? Ohio. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Let’s start in Maryland, where CBS projects that Joe Biden has beaten Donald Trump. ”[imitating Trump] But Maryland and I have a lot in common. We are both famous for feeding crabs to people. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Now we can predict that Delaware was won by Joe Biden. Well, I should hope so, it’s his home state. That would be like Donald Trump losing New York. [beat] What is he? That must hurt. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Well, you know what they say: If you can get here, you’re not Donald Trump.” – STEPHEN COLBERT

And a little further west or north, I’m not sure, Indiana just called Donald Trump. Of course – it’s either voting for him or bringing Mike Pence back. It was an easy call. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“And for any Oakies wondering how your pans are being handled, I can now confidently report that the state of Oklahoma is being called upon for Donald Trump. Well, you know how the song plays out: [singing] “Oklahoma where they don’t care. Trump killed Herman Cain.” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Biden has won the hearts of the Bostonians with his emotional message telling a guy from New York to close hell.” – STEPHEN COLBERT, returns to Biden, takes Massachusetts

“Of course in New Hampshire in 2020, ‘Live Free or Die’ is not just a motto, it’s two options on the ballot.” – STEPHEN COLBERT, during Biden’s victory in New Hampshire

“It turns out the Constitutional state likes someone who has read the Constitution.” – STEPHEN COLBERT, is on Biden, takes Connecticut

“Not surprisingly, Donald Trump also won Tennessee, where there is a real state gun, the Barrett 50 Caliber M82, which I am being told has also won the upper house seat.” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“First of all, New Hampshire. Incumbent Democratic Senator Jeanne Shaheen defeated Republican Corky Messner. And the 231-year record without Corkys in Congress continues. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

“And in Kentucky, Mitch McConnell defeated Amy McGrath of the Democrats. So it looks like, unlike his hand, Mitch McConnell’s chair won’t turn blue. ” – TREVOR NOAH

And in South Carolina, Republican Lindsey Graham beat out Democrat Jamie Harrison. Not really a big surprise. The South continued to hold a significant alliance monument ”. – TREVOR NOAH

“We can also officially guess that the race to the Massachu-chu Senate has been called for Democratic Senator Ed Markey. Senator Markey is the incumbent and co-author of The New Green Deal, so it is fitting that Massachusetts has decided to reuse him. – STEPHEN COLBERT

“Some of the Dust Bowl results has already been shown. The race to enter the Oklahoma Senate has been called for a global warning decline and GOP’s incumbent Jim Inhoff. Inhoff is favored a lot to win so he doesn’t have to worry about the outcome. He was sweating profusely because somehow it was warmer every year than the previous year. ” – STEPHEN COLBERT

Colbert’s Showtime special offers a soothing end to a nail-biting night with “The Things You Feel Like You Want to Be.”


Source link